what the hell happened to your face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

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Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

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How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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Two guys walk into a bar.

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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whats long and stretchy? elastic

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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