Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

Illumati Confirmed

whats black. an african american person

Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

I asked her where you were.

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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