What's black and white and roams the sea floor? A zebra.

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

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Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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A baby gets hit by a bus.

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Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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