Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

Why do black people have dark skin? Lack of melanin in their skin. You learn something new every day.

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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