King Triton: "As much as it pains me to lose you, Ariel, I want you to be happy with your prince..." Ariel: "So why don't you just turn Eric into a merman?" King Triton: "Good idea."

why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

How are humans like slinkies? - They are not good for very much and bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs!

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

Q: What's worse than school? A:Your mum dying

How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

p

why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

What's a cow's favorite vacation spot? the slaughterhouse.

TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

Jesus walks int a hotel and places a handful of nails on the counter in front of the innkeeper. He is immediately turned away as the innkeeper understandably does not accept nails as currency.

BIG PENIS

Q: What has two wheels and is not funny? A:Ryan Vallee on a segway -Ryan V

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...