What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

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Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

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what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

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A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

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Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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How many mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

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Why did the gorilla leave the zoo? He didn't, he was released.

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Who is John Galt?

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what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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YEAH THEY DO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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