Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

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Jimmy Saville

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im at school

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

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A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

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Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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