Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Mike tyson

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

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What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

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Why is it that we don't eat clowns? Because in most Western countries cannibalism is illegal.

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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oooh look a banshee

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

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jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

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Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

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a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

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What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

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A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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