Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

your mums so fat that shes HUGE!!!!

What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

robin, get in the car.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

Jokes are funny.

My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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