Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

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YOU

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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I asked her where you were.

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What is an anti-joke? This is.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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