Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

your mama so old, shes dead.

What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

whats forever alone me

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

Knock knock.

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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