What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down

DEATH.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

cum on guys, gay jokes are mean

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops