A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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Canida

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

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Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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The dyslexic man called the black man a ginger.

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Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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