A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

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-Ask me if i'm a crab. -Are you a crab? -No, why would i be a crab?

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Hi.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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25.

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What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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