What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

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My phone rang. So I answered it.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Double-whammy

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

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How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

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How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops