Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

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yolo mother f-uckaaaa

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Knock knock! Ding dong.

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

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What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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