Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

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What do you call the twin towers? An airport

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a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

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I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's wet.

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Why was the dog crying? Because his owners hated him and called him stupid.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

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Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. "Knock, Knock" "Who's There?" "Not Sally."

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Rough day?" says the bartender. UUUNNNHHHHH!

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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