i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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How did the Joker get away? Because the Batmobile lost a wheel.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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your mother hates you

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

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what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

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whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

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What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Yo mama so stupid She took in part of an experiment and was indeed proclaimed stupid.

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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