why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

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What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

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How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? TEN HOLOCAUSTS!!!!

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because eating raw chicken is just wrong.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

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Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

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Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -A kazoo. -A kazoo who? -A small, simple musical instrument consisting of a hollow pipe with a hole in it, over which is a thin covering that vibrates and produces a buzzing sound when the player sings or hums into the pipe.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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