Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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A bar walks into a man... Wait...

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a man walks into a bar... it was a crow-bar

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

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WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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Republicans

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

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Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

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dead battery come on down

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A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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why did the baby die because it was diagnosed with lukimia

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You are Nerochan right?

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A black man, a white man and a Mexican are in a car... Who is driving... A police man

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Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

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What's brown and sticky? 'Brown' is a colour, and 'sticky' is a consistency. Please try and use correct grammar.

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Whats so funny? Josh nash's face

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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