A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

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Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Guess what! what haha u listened to me

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What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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Knock Knock! Who's there? What do you mean... we have been having a conversation for a half hour now... that's your name you idiot, Knock Knock!

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

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What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

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A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

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What can you never have for dinner? Breakfast and lunch

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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