Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

Knock knock Who is there Banana Banana who Knock knock Who's there Banana Banana who Knock knock WHO'S THERE orange ...orange who Orange you glad I'm a cop here to tell you your family died in a horrible mask murdering and didn't say bannana again?

Fiats

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

A white man, a black man, an Asian man, a Mexican man, a subasian man, an Austrailian man, and a Canadian white man. That's it.

Whats black and white, and red all over? A Zebra being slaughtered.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? I don't know but it's not the little girl.

THEN WHO WAS FONE?

Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

If you don't get this joke, you're gay.

Colby is gay.... thats it

Knock knock Who's there Santa who santa hates you and that is why you got nothing for Christmastime

why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

how do you make a orange juice. get orange juice and pour it in a cup.

What's retarded and comes from Hulsberg? Roy Knubben

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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