That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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Lebron James vs. Kobe Bryant

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Whats brown,looks like a.dike,and is a whore. Marcella

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

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What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

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Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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your a towel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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