A dog walks into a bar. the bar tender asks" what'll you have?" the dog does not reply because dogs have not yet developed the type of voice box required to speak or the learning cappacity to be taught the English language.

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F U C K Y O U W I T H Y O U R A N T I J O K E S

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four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Jackson gets a new phone he drops it what does he have. (a beating )

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

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Q: What's the biggest difference between a black man and a white man? A: Their skin color.

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Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

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(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

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what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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