What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

Nickelback

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

A blond, a brunette, and a red-head are standing on the edge of a cliff. They then realize how dangerous that is and proceed to back away and view the canyon at a safe distance.

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

69

Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

F U C K Y O U W I T H Y O U R A N T I J O K E S

The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

Women.

Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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