A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

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I have a crush on my dad.

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Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

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What doesn't have opposable thumbs, barks at the mail man, eats dog food, and is good at every sport? Air bud

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Knock, knock (No one was home)

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What's wrong with shooting an african american? Everything, it's murder.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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haha, you're an orphan

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What's a black person's favorite thing to eat? Food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

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Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Why can't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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