Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

How do you make a business man cry? Hit him in the face with a brick

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being shipped to KFC.

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

look left ------------------------------------------------------> i bet you failed.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

knock knock who's there?

What's red and hurts your teeth? A brick.

Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

Whats worst than getting screwed. Your mother

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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