What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

Why was Timmy dirty? Because he was buried

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

What is black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Not black berries because black berries come from a bush.

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Why was johny late to school? He died

A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

stop it ryan vallee

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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