How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

What's funny and arousing? This joke.

Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

What do black men do in the South? Hang around

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...