What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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