Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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