How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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