What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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knock knock Goodbye

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops