Where would canada be without nature? still here

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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