How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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