A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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