A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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