how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

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What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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What did the black guy say when he failed his math test? Crap, I failed my math test!

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What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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