So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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