Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops