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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Nothing. He made it home safely.

What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...