Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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deez nuts

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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A whole 'nother.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops