Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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