what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

no.

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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