A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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