Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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My dog barks when someones at the door.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops