What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

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What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

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black people swimming

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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