What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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