what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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guess what? bannanas

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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