Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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