How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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A van drives into a car.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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