Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops