Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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What's just not right? Left

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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