Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

Chuck Norris.

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

kennah campion when she talks

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

What is your name? My name is Jeff

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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