A dog was barking at a tree

What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

roses are red poo is poo

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

Is Yered a dumbass? YA

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...