guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops