Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops