What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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This is an anti-joke.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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